The Scorpion and the Frog
I (re)discovered this fable recently and was reminded of how much I like it.
I am always amazed aat how certain people and companies can't help themselves and self-destroy along the way.
Sad. But so true...
One day, a scorpion looked around at the mountain where he lived and decided that he wanted a change. So he set out on a journey through the forests and hills. He climbed over rocks and under vines and kept going until he reached a river.The river was wide and swift, and the scorpion stopped to reconsider the situation. He couldn't see any way across. So he ran upriver and then checked downriver, all the while thinking that he might have to turn back.
Suddenly, he saw a frog sitting in the rushes by the bank of the stream on the other side of the river. He decided to ask the frog for help getting across the stream.
"Hellooo Mr. Frog!" called the scorpion across the water, "Would you be so kind as to give me a ride on your back across the river?"
"Well now, Mr. Scorpion! How do I know that if I try to help you, you wont try to kill me?" asked the frog hesitantly.
"Because," the scorpion replied, "If I try to kill you, then I would die too, for you see I cannot swim!"
Now this seemed to make sense to the frog. But he asked. "What about when I get close to the bank? You could still try to kill me and get back to the shore!"
"This is true," agreed the scorpion, "But then I wouldn't be able to get to the other side of the river!"
"Alright then...how do I know you wont just wait till we get to the other side and THEN kill me?" said the frog.
"Ahh...," crooned the scorpion, "Because you see, once you've taken me to the other side of this river, I will be so grateful for your help, that it would hardly be fair to reward you with death, now would it?!"
So the frog agreed to take the scorpion across the river. He swam over to the bank and settled himself near the mud to pick up his passenger. The scorpion crawled onto the frog's back, his sharp claws prickling into the frog's soft hide, and the frog slid into the river. The muddy water swirled around them, but the frog stayed near the surface so the scorpion would not drown. He kicked strongly through the first half of the stream, his flippers paddling wildly against the current.
Halfway across the river, the frog suddenly felt a sharp sting in his back and, out of the corner of his eye, saw the scorpion remove his stinger from the frog's back. A deadening numbness began to creep into his limbs.
"You fool!" croaked the frog, "Now we shall both die! Why on earth did you do that?"
The scorpion shrugged, and did a little jig on the drownings frog's back.
"I could not help myself. It is my nature."
Then they both sank into the muddy waters of the swiftly flowing river.
hi,
Here's another. It's a joke but . . .
One day Mr. Rabbit was walking through the forest. He meets up with Mr. Bear and says, "hello Mr. Bear and how are you" and Mr. Bear replies, "I'm fine but I've got stomach troubles and, oops . . . "
Mr. Bear disappears behind a tree. He re-emerges and says to Mr. Rabbit, "sorry about that but tell me Mr. Rabbit does shite stick to your fur?"
Mr. Rabbit replies, "no, Mr. Bear, we rabbits have very dry shite and it doesn't stick to us."
"That's good," says the bear and he picks up the rabbit and wipes his ass with it.
scott
Good one !
I never saw this joke under this light before, but it actually describes my thought very well 
hi,
Here's another thoughtful comment about bears, and life, and how to survive it :
If you go camping in the wild and you're attacked by a bear, remember, you don't have to run faster than the bear just faster than the slowest camper.
scott
So true
Here is another one
An 80 year old man was having his annual checkup, and the doctor asked him how he was feeling.
"I've never been better!" he boasted."I've got an eighteen year old bride who's pregnant, and having my child! What do you think about that?"
The doctor considered this for a moment, then said,
"Let me tell you a story. I knew a guy who was an avid hunter. He never missed a season. But one day went out in a bit of a hurry, and he accidentally grabbed his umbrella instead of his gun."The doctor continued,
"So he was in the woods, and suddenly a grizzly bear appeared in front of him! He raised up his umbrella, pointed it at the bear, and squeezed the handle.""And do you know what happened?"the doctor queried.
Dumbfounded, the old man replied "No."
The doctor continued, "The bear dropped dead in front of him!"
"That's impossible!" exclaimed the old man.
"Someone else must have shot that bear.""That's kind of what I'm getting at..."
replied the doctor.
hi,
Jokes with a point other than vulgarity are always funny. I was once referred to with the phrase "you can't teach an old dog new tricks." And this by a younger guy who didn't have a single trick up his sleeve, or anywhere else.
Younger is often faster but thicker :
Two bulls were in the field. The younger one hurried over to the older one and said, "hey, the farmer has left the gate open where the cows are, let's dash over and do a couple."
The older bull replied, "no, sonny, let's walk over and do them all."
Older may be slower but it's more thorough.
scott